Yeah, But Do The Curtains Match The Carpet?

Slag

this is the reason why girlfights in high school are so funny. zap2it reports:

Star Jones leaves on her terms, but Barbara Walters gets the last word

i predict that star jones will become the new tyra banks. my hopes of seeing the most narcissistic show on television (star and rosie) have been dashed. all said, that still doesnt change the fact that this is show is basically unwatchable. good luck ladies, good luck.

Single White Boner

burn baby burn. eonline reports:

Despite its advertised benefits, Viagra isn't doing Rush Limbaugh any favors.

no wonder he's always working the "powerless" white male angle. this once again proves the addage: even a blind squirrel gets a nut once in a while...i suppose in this case it'd be more like even a deaf squirrel needs viagra once in a while.

Movie Review: Million Dollar Baby PG13-4 Strings

a pretty safe movie. drammatic and silly and predictably award winning. the film gets very long near the end and there is plenty cliche to last the entire film. let me also take this moment to complain that boxing movie fights (nothing but head shots) are nothing like actual boxing fights (nothing but standing around and the occasional punch).

Movie Review: Primer PG13-4 Strings

my brother would love this movie...and he could do a better job of explaining this one to me. a fantastic sci fi/sci physics flick. a bit heady, and you may want to have a beer or two before watching it, but people who enjoy metacognition and its philosophical implicatons should check this one out. tons of fun.

Movie Review: Day Of The Dead R-1 String

one string? zombie flick.

this is the worst film ive seen in decades. DECADES!! skip this film and watch '28 days'. '28' is what this film was trying to be...cerebrial vs physical.

totally lame.

Movie Review: The Assasination Of Richard Nixon R-4 Strings

sean penn is simply one of the best raw actors of our time. an incredible performance. think 'conspiracy theory' and 'i am sam' all in one movie. just a hardcore performance. penn really makes me believe in the art of film again.

Movie Review: A Love Song For Bobby Long R-3 Strings

john travolta seems to have an uncanny knack for making perfectly average films. presidents daughter, you name 'em. you cant really hate any of them, but they really never get off the ground either. scarlett johanssen is on my wait list, thats another reason i checked this one out.

Just Like The Good Old Days

once a bad town, always a bad town. bbc reports:

US soldiers are set to be redeployed on the streets of New Orleans to fight crime for the first time since the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina.

good to see that "keeping the city chocolate" is working out mayor nagin. looks like the rebuilding is done. lets cut back on the money currently being spent there, and start getting back to spending it on the iraq war.

What'll They Think Of Next?

i blame dan brown and the davinci code. bbc reports:

The US Episcopal Church has chosen a woman as its next leader - making it the first church anywhere in the Anglican denomination to do so.

is nothing sacred anymore? women leading a church i suppose next youll be telling me that jesus had short hair...as if. who'd of thought that episcopals were on the cutting edge of social evolution.

Movie Review: Night Of The Living Dead UR-5 Strings

after watching countless zombie movies, it recently occured to me that i havent seen the original zombie flick. this one has so much camp and overacting its impressive. a true original of the horror form. apparently there's a comedy version with a laugh track. if you cant laugh at zombies, what can you laugh at??

Movie Review: A History Of Violence R-4 Strings

fascinating film. cant tell you much as that would pretty much ruin the plot, but im really impressed with hollywood on this one: a new story that, in mainstream film, hasnt been told before. very very violent, so be warned.

Movie Review: Munich R-4 Strings

a fascinating tale here about the untold retribution of the black september killings during the munich olympics. stupid me, i had no idea there was backlash in the form of jewish hitmen. a worthy story told well. a bit long in spots, but these days, what isnt?

Movie Review: Bubble R-2 Strings

a forgettable film. released on cable, dvd and theater on the same day. an idea long overdue...too bad it was this movie that was the groundbreaker. lots of silence and minimal acting enough understatement as overstatement here to bury a corpse.

Movie Review: Nacho Libre PG-3 Strings

a silly film caried almost entirely on the back of jack black. like napoleon dynamite, there's not much in the movie to really hang your coat on, but its silly and pleasant. certainly worth the rental...just dont take it too seriously and enjoy. a few very funny a moments.

Movie Review: Cars G-5 Strings

computer graphics are finally getting to the point in which reality and cg. there were moments where it was hard to tell if i was watching film or computer created animation. the story was fine, and there were plenty of fun moments without falling in to stereotype of boring cheap contemporary culture referrences. pixar does it again.

Movie Review: Suspect Zero R-2 Strings

a doable movie thats been done by nearly everyone. rob zombie movies are much grittier, and believable. this one gets interesting in the last 8 minutes, and even then fumbles the ball. ghandi deserves better.

Free At Last...

good to see china is progressing into the new era. dailytimes reports:

The Google.com search engine has been blocked in most parts of China, as Beijing steps up its efforts to restrict the public’s access to information

turns out, my grandfather was right: never trust a communist. china, trying to present itself as a progressive country is becoming more brazen at screwing its own people. the only difference between america and china is that china is unafraid to screw over its own people in public. at least in america we try to hide it.

Summer Vacation...

sorry for the slow updates, but im enjoying a summer vacation. never fear, duhliterate is here.

Movie Review: Stage Beauty R-3 Strings

claire danes, the newest inductee to my currently two person list, works her hardest make her english accent believable...all the more endearing, i say. a brief glimpse of 'the goods', which is most welcome, but what was heading towards a lovely, human movie, simply goes hollywood and (worse) californian. decent, but not believable.

Movie Review: The Rutles NR-5 Strings

if you are a partial fan of the beatles or a partial fan of monty python, you will find this film absolutely hilarious. even george harrison was in this one. who can forget the timeless tune ouch! (help!), or a hard days rut. simply hilarous! cher cher la femme! a fabulous retelling of the beatles story. enjoy.

Movie Review: X-Men: The Last Stand PG13-4 Strings

this movie is about all youd expect it to be...loud, and explosive. lots of comic book fun here. at only 1:44, the movie feels a little long and a bit unbelievable. when you watch this, make sure you stay all the way through the credits...a little tidbit comes in at the end. good times.

Movie Review: 3 Extremes R-4 Strings

probably best you dont watch this one if you value your eternal soul. 3 short films 2 of which are bizaare and frightful, and the 3rd of which is so disturbing, id prefer to not tell you about it--other than it is the most intimate of madea stories. my oh my.

Movie Review: Underworld: Evolution R-4 Strings

i gave this one an extra string because its an R movie (just as it should be), and because kate beckinsale is dressed in vinyl! (hey now) the real downside of this one has to do with all the bloody names. lots of attempt to connect to the previous film, which kind of drags it down.

Got Stupid?

even a half-wit can get pregnant. washingtonpost reports:

Anna Nicole Smith has confirmed that she's pregnant, in a video clip posted on her Web site.

now that shes got a steady stream of cash, this just makes sense. like salad in a cup...it feels so, i dont know, right.

That's Hot

i want to be outraged, then again, im kind of turned on. yahoo reports:

DC Comics is resurrecting the classic comic book character as a lesbian, unveiling the new Batwoman in July as part of an ongoing weekly series that began this year.

i cant think of anything a teenage boy needs more of than a totally hot lesbian superhero and the innevitable love story plotline with another totaly hot comic book lesbian. then again, in order to authenticate her, they may just make her uniform plaid and cut her hair into a mullet.