Annika

talking to uncle brad...angry face...and lots of ice cream.

Brooke Vs. Tom: Score 2 to 1

brooke shields is more fertile than tom cruise, and heres proof. yahoo reports:

"Brooke Shields, who famously battled postpartum depression, says she's thrilled to be pregnant with her second child. The baby is due in the spring, her publicist, Alan Eichorn, confirmed Thursday."

take that tom...scientology may cure your depression, but it wont give you many children. brooke seems to be tempting fate with this whole post-partum-depression-children thing by having another child. no doubt shell parlay it into another oprah appearance. personally, im REALLY hoping katie goes into a murderous rage after she has her kid, just to see if tom cruise can fix her scientology style.

Harriet Miers Looks Like Rachel Dratch

seperated at birth.

Movie Review: Cube R-4 Strings

man, i love this move. really sci fi and offbeat. a weird puzzle, like a rubics cube. im watching cube 2 right now, and it SUCKS by comparison...full of cliches and stereotypes. if you want a semi scary sci-fi flick, jump on in and rent cube. good times.

Early Review: Saw II--R

i have to say i watched saw a little while ago, and it freaked the bejesus out of me. it almost reached the level of silence of the lambs. jen refused to watch it, and i can see why. if the first movie, which i heartily recommend, is any indication, this movie should be good as well.

"Yo, man, don't you owe me some money?"

its good to see that im not the only one who hits up his friends in hard times. abc entertainment reports:

" A former associate who is suing Michael Jackson for more than $3 million has been accused by the entertainer of concealing and misappropriating funds.

Jackson filed the cross-complaint against Marc Schaffel in Los Angeles County Superior Court on Oct. 18, his lawyer, Brent Ayscough, said Wednesday."

i can hear mike right now..."HOW MUCH i got in the bank??? but i own all the beatles tunes! latoya's got more money than me?? get me my rolodex!!!"

Movie Review: The Filth and the Fury R-4 Strings

this is a documentary about a the original self-destructive band. i was never ever anti sex pistols, i just was never really in to them that much. this movie captures the whole scene pretty well. for instance, who in the world that siouxsie sioux (siouxsie and the banshees) was a sex pistols groupie.

these guys were very anti corporate, and were shipped from label to label, putting out only one album before sid died. im all about anti corporate. so check this movie out. plus, i wanted to prove to you all that im not a total faige (what with putting up all that hollywood crap and all).

Simpson Fans Lurk in the Shadow Among Us or The Death of Radio

it appears that there are a lot of closet ashlee simpson fans out there. yahoo reports:

"Simpson's I Am Me sold 220,000 copies for the week ended Sunday, while Stewart's Songbook moved 193,000, according to Nielsen SoundScan tracking. It's the sixth week in a row that a new album has debuted at number one on the Billboard 200."

220,000 people spent $18 on that sausage. what right do we, as a country, have to complain about high gas prices when were spending that kind of cash on that kind of load?? its also important to note that rod stewart has completely given up on retaining any semblance of his 70s era punkishness. theres one thing that rod stewart has no business doing, and thats singing depression era showtunes.

Oh yeah, she's desperate...

Movie Review: Hero PG13-3 Strings

i think ive faded on visually impressive, low storyline chinese martial arts movies. this movie looks astounding, but wont transfer well to a small screen tv like mine. its a story of love for a country, based on a legendary chinese warrior. alot like crouching tiger, hidden dragon. if youve seen tiger, youve pretty much seen this one too.

Movie Review: Children Underground NR-4 Strings

only watch this movie if you have absolutely no affect about parents or children. this movie will either anger you, and make you weep. its about romanian children who are homeless...and drug addicted and hunry. what in the world is an 8 year old kid doing being homeless?? i must warn you, if youre already a depressed person, i recommend you dont watch this one.

Jennifer Lopez as...Veruca Salt

jennifer discovers that all you need to do is want one in order to get one. the insider reports:

"All JENNIFER LOPEZ apparently really wants is an Oscar. I hear the bombshell from the Bronx has been telling friends that her main priority right now is to win an Academy Award®."

with that in mind, id like to announce to the academy committee that i, too, an ready for my academy award winning role. i really want one bad, and i dont think my life/career/intellect could do without one. the funny thing is that she thinks that an award like this will make her credible. if she actually wins one of these, the academy will indeed have lost all credibility.

World Series?

apparently the world series started. the midwest of america dukes it out for nominal bragging rights.

im telling you, baseball should end when football starts. basketball should start when football ends...and so forth. even better, cut the baseball season short by 37 games, and i tell you NO ONE will notice the difference.

President and SpongeBob, Together Again

spongebob and his longtime friend patrick, i mean president, support healthy eating. yahoo reports:

"Bill Clinton is teaming with SpongeBob SquarePants and Dora the Explorer in a campaign to nudge kids to eat healthy foods and to get up off the couch and move, the former president and Nickelodeon television executives announced Thursday."

do kids know anything (or care for that matter) about president clinton? "mommy, why is that guy with a funny nose telling me is should eat a carrot? he's scaring me." should former presidents--especially this one--be telling children to eat cylindrically shaped food?

Movie Review: The Devil's Rejects R--5 Strings

what a great movie. pointless violence and nakedness. what a way to celebrate halloween. i told jenny not to go to this one, and she didnt. i retold the movie to her, and she had nightmares based on my retelling of it. parts of this a rather creepy. im beginning to really believe that rob zombie should be taken seriously as a film director.

Movie Review: A Sin City R--5 Strings

an amazing move, recently released on dvd. put this movie on your netflix account. you will have not seen a movie like this. watch it, if for no other reason, because the director quite the directors guild to co-direct with the comic book creator. nice and rebelious. this movie is absolutely violent...beyond violent.

Believe it or not, I DO have a soul

daughters and food...does it get any better?

Hot Guy With Funny Name Still Employed

the enigma that is ashton kutcher is convinced that we arent sick of him yet. yahoo reports:

"The Punk'd purveyor is producing a sitcom pilot for Fox titled 30 Year Old Grandpa about a younger man who marries an older woman and becomes the stepfather to her children, who are close to his own age."

let me take a moment to say that im not entirely convinced demi moore isnt a robot. that said, i know that deep down we all think that kutcher is functionally retarded. dont get mad...i DID say functionally. i dont hate him half as much as i am amazed that he is on the tv at all. he had to have maee a deal with the devil to be where he is right now.

Movie Review: Finding Neverland PG--3 Strings

the best part about this movie was johnny depps accent--totally believable. when people spoke about this movie, they said it was like the second coming. i went in with huge expectations. visually, i wasnt disappointed, but in terms of the story, it just didnt amaze. good, to be sure, but not amazing. to be honest, a bit of a chick flick...and a period piece at that.

Movie Review: Equilibrium R--4 Strings

i was hooked up to this movie by my boy, miggity mike, former military dude. this movie went straight to video...the production wasnt quite there, and it had a few too many plot holes to really make it fly on the bigscreen. it stars christian bale...boy this guy can pull together these dark characters--for my money, he's the new keanu reeves. way better, way darker.

this movie has the best hand to hand gun battle that ive EVER seen. point blank shooting that even tops the matrix. fellas, geek it with this one.

DVD Release: Batman Begins--5 Strings

this movie is outstanding, and decidedly un-gay. i was really bummed about katie holmes' part, because at the very very end of the movie, the director tries to push a plot thing, that shouldnt have even been there in the first place...you know the one im talking about. im still going to complain about the fact that every female in a twenty mile radius of batman seems to know or figure out his identity...cant a guy have ANY secrets?

"My face looks like a punching bag, so I just figured..."

sly needs a paycheck, so he's dusting off the yellow gloves. eonline reports:

"Cue "Eye of the Tiger"--the Italian Stallion is coming out of retirement for more one shot.
Sylvester Stallone has signed on to reprise his role as the boxing champ for a sixth installment in the once mighty franchise."

finally a reason for italian americans to be embarassed again. too much of that cool gangster/sopranos stuff. its time that they get taken down a notch...and i think sly is just the man to do it. i heard on stern that mr. t will be coming back for a part in the movie.

on another note, im curious if anyone knows a bloody thing about boxing anymore. i refuse to payperview ANY fight. i remember watching ali and spinks and sugar ray when i was a kid with my dad. i havent seen a heavyweight bout in probably two decades. tragic really

Duhliterate recommends to his brother, Brad

disasterthemovie.com
THIS is the proper website for the motley crue movie. im not sure what to make of it, but it is pretty funny...kind of like team america.

equilibrium
this movie stars christian bale, and i think it was a straight to vid release. its a futuristic thing, so i know youll like it. i must also say that this has the single best hand to hand gun battle (at the end) that ive EVER seen. ripping. absolutely ripping.

An Olsen, I Can't Tell Which, Quits College

one of the olsen twins takes her first step in the ultimate tailspin. yahoo reports:

"Ashley, on the '80s comedy "Full House," has dropped out of college, early in her sophomore year, according to a published report."

real work, it seems, is rather difficult.

is it possible to get a major in 'hotness'? at the tender age of under 21, one of the olsen sisters, here, is finally paying the karma debt owed for the turdfest: full house (which, of course, shouldve been titled: full mullet).

Movie Review: Dancer in the Dark R--5 Strings

i originally refused to see this movie because bjork annoyed the hell out of me...yeah, she's impish and elf-like. blah blah blah.

i was blown away by this movie. watch this long movie (2 hrs, 20) if youre in a moody, anti-american mood. a touching story about a woman who is losing her sight. the only real reason to hate this movie is because the french loved it. the only thing more annoying than bjork is the french. you do the math.

Movie Review: Code 46 R--2 Strings

this movie confused me more than it should have. i fancy myself as reasonably intelligent, as well as a fan of science fiction. this movie stars the screaming girl in minority report. if you absolutely love sci fi, than put this movie on your list. you'll walk away with lots of questions, and plenty of confusion. but of course, that may be my lack of sophistication.

Sky Captain gets dumped by girl named after a Toyota SUV

sienna miller proves shes better than her nanny by breaking up with jude law. yahoo reports:

"Sienna Miller and Jude Law have ended their engagement, months after he apologized for an affair with his children's nanny, according to a published report."

you know, sienna (or the nanny for that matter), could serve me a hamburger at the local mcdonald's, and i wouldnt know who in the world she is. i hear she's pretty gorgeous--but who can keep up with a nanny fetish? poor sienna; apprently all you had going for you was blinding hotness. you had to see this coming, right? jude law...jude, short for judas.

Concert Review: System of a Down, Mars Volta, Hella--5 Strings

sorry these photos are small--thats how far away i sat. ill review each of these bands seperately...

hella:
in the halls outside, i heard a buch of people say, 'hella suck', as in 'they hella suck'. im not sure if they do or not, but i would like to take this moment to assert that, in general, its a bad idea to use an adjective as your band name. stinky, ugly, stupid...all lend themselves to all sorts taunts.

i was indifferent to the band. sure it was different and whatnot. but what really blew me away was their drummer who played like i was having a seizure the entire time. it reminded me of animal from the muppet show...a constant vibration of bass drum against my chest. kind of soothing.

mars volta:
rolling stone wont shut up about these guys. they did a few songs in spanish, and there were 8 mofo's on the stage...a much bigger band than i had thought. they have everything the modern trendy band needs: defiant lead singer with a high voice, rambunctious guitars and a keyboard player. the lead singer also has that new straight-backed-seizure-sing-herkyjerky motion that seems to be real hip right now.

these fellas really sounded like Rush, without the talent. same vocals. "were gonna do one more song..." said the spazzy lead singer. thought, 'thats cool.' 45 minutes later, they finally wrapped up the song. let me go on record saying that i hate jam bands. i know thats uncool and makes me sound old, but listening to average musicians play a 'song' for 45 minutes just kills me. that sort of stuff just reeks of self indulgence.

system of a down:
loads and loads of irony. way massive sound for a basic 4-piece band. the vocals were live and everything was in the moment (something even motley crue didnt even pull off). no real showy stuff here. just plenty of noise, and plenty of lights. the pit on the floor was massive and sweaty. the one guy who wasnt sweaty was the lead singer of SOAD.

like me, it was mostly a radio crowd, who really only got down for the songs that they knew. nothing like a rousing chorus of, 'f--- u pig' during a song. to their credit, they sang 'system of a down' to the tune of dire straights', 'sultans of swing'. in an interesting move, the guitar player would start each song by himself, singing the chorus...which helped for the losers like me who dont own the albums.

which brings me to another point. i dont own any SOAD albums, because im boycotting the music industry. not enough money goes to the artists, and they are suing their listeners (f u pigs).

Duhliterate Recommends to his Brother, Brad

a new feature id like to throw in here. stuff that i want to shoot my brothers way, and hence your way as well...

the institute: come on over, bullet proof skin.
gavin rosdale's new band (i know how lame that sounds). these tunes/this band sound astoundingly like sometime sunday. dl those tracks and tell me what you think.

destructionthemovie.com
i havent actually seen the movie so i cant vouch for it (the downside of still working on a mac computer). this was the 'movie' that was showing during the intermission at the motley crue concert. it was a claymation deal, and looked absolutely weird.

theviewfrommybeer.blogspot.com
its time i start putting my beer drinking to good use.

Concert Review: Motley M--F-ing Crue--5 Strings

i actually had no idea i was going to this concert. which is another story in itself (i thought i was doing set up for the system of a down concert). this is what i get for going through my life only half paying attention. on to the review:

what a show...circus-type atmosphere, and so much foul language from the stage, i thought i was at a marine recruitment center. the audience? thought youd never ask. ages ranging from 7th grade to mid-50s. heavy metal chicks in the audience, all battling for cleavage supremecy.

the band would play for about 45 minutes, then take a 10 minute break...what a novel idea! gave everyone a chance to go buy beer or take a leak! during one of the breaks, tommy lee came out with what he announced was the 'porno cam'. and he wanted to see lots of boobies...which, of course, he got to see. shot them with the cam, and blasted them onto the bigsreens. i wouldve felt bad for these women, if it werent so funny. well, thats not true...i do still feel a little bad.

the band ended their set with the sex pistols' anarchy. a class move for a decidedly 'unclassy' show. enjoy the picks!

Movie Review: Ladder 49 PG-13--3 Strings

you know, i liked this movie better the first time i saw it when it was called 'top gun'. this movie has all the movie cliches. the anxious wife, the good, salt-of-the-earth man, the fatherly elder, the tragic death. its all in there. its watchable and an easy way to kill 90 minutes.